Choosing Adoption


Written by Julie Stuckenschneider

When found with an unplanned pregnancy many expectant mothers unfortunately don’t feel like they have many options. Ideally the best scenario would be for the baby to stay with the mother, but due to many different circumstances that may not be possible or what is best for the child or mother. Adoption is a wonderful option for these kinds of situations. Although it may get a bad reputation with people telling the mothers they’re “giving up” their child, it is actually one of the most loving and selfless acts a mother can perform. Understanding that you are not in a position to care for that child like they should be and in turn finding a family that can provide the love and care that child needs is nothing to be ashamed of. Not to mention how much of a role you can play, if you choose to do so in the adoption process of your baby.

There are a couple different ways you can initiate the process of adoption. You can choose to work with an adoption agency or a private adoption attorney. Both offer counseling for the mother prior to making the decision of adoption. Options United helps women with unplanned pregnancies find the resources they need to start this process and OU would never try to coerce a woman to make a decision between keeping their child or using adoption. If adoption is chosen the mother can decide how much she wants to be involved in the child’s life via either an open or closed adoption. An open adoption is when the birth parents and adoptive families keep in regular contact. Whereas a closed adoption is confidential and results in the birthing parents and adoptive parents not being in contact prior to or after the birth of the child.

When choosing an adoptive family, mothers can rest assured that parents who want to adopt must go through a number of requirements including an in depth home study to determine whether they are ready and able to parent. Expectant mothers will be able to view parent profiles and gather information with the help of their adoption counselor, and then choose an individual or couple to consider for potential placement. After that the mom can choose to talk with the prospective parents or meet them in person.

Mothers of unplanned pregnancies who are considering adoption may be concerned with costs. Health insurance, the adoption agency and even the prospective parents can all help with pregnancy costs making the process more attainable.

Finally, women who do decide on adoption have the option for counseling to help cope with emotions after their decision. You just carried a life with you and blessed another couple with this precious life, and that can lead to a whirlwind of emotions. But just like you weren’t alone during the process you aren’t alone now.

All in all, adoption is a great option for women with unplanned pregnancies. The process may seem scary at first but there are people and organizations out there that can help, like Options United. OU specializes in working with women with unplanned pregnancies and can help these women find the resources they need to aid in their decision process. You are not alone nor do you have to feel that way. If you feel you cannot provide for your child or that you aren’t the best option for them please consider adoption. There are many families out there who would love to have the chance to love and care for a precious baby.

Read more about how Options United assists in the adoption process here: