Defining Motherhood


Written by Julie Stuckenschneider 

Motherhood is a generic term applied to mothers. According to motherhood is defined as “the state of being a mother”. If you ask any mother to define motherhood, it’s safe to say that the dictionary term does a poor job in defining motherhood. Yes, being the woman who had a baby gives you the title of mother but there is much more to it than just a name. Motherhood is by far the hardest yet rewarding experience I have ever done. My brain is constantly going, I am always tired, I feel burnt out, touched out and just overall overwhelmed some days. Whether you work or stay home, us moms are responsible for all the things; cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, meal planning, doctors appointments, medications, emotional counselor, the list goes on and on. If you’re anything like me your brain is like an internet browser with 500 tabs open and you cannot decide what page to be on. It sounds terrible I know, and makes you wonder why anyone would want to do it. But then your baby will have their first smile or say their first word, your toddler will come running to you with their arms wide open screaming “I love you”, or they’ll draw you a picture and be so proud of themselves that the fact you don’t know what it is won’t matter. Yes there are hard days, but I promise you friends the good days more than definitely outweigh the bad.

My 4 year old daughter is my buddy. She goes everywhere with me and, it sounds crazy to say but, she has my back. When my husband teases me she’ll chime in and stick up for me or she holds my hand and tells me she’s always here for me. She does everything with me and I honestly wouldn’t want it any other way. Then when her sister was born I leaned on my toddler more than I like to admit. I struggled with postpartum depression and anxiety but my little girl always was there just when I needed her. She’d give the best hugs and tell me it was going to be okay. She absolutely melts my heart.

Then my second child, who is now 11 months, just lights up when she sees me. She wobbly walks or crawls as fast as she can to get to me. She makes meal times entertaining as she blows raspberries or fake laughs at her sister. There is really never a dull moment in my household. Yes I may be busier and yes I may not have a social life as I used to but I wouldn’t change it for the world. These two little girls are my world and have changed my life in a good way. I cherish every moment I have with them as I know time is a thief. They inspire me to be better as I now have two sets of little eyes watching me. And I never go a day feeling unloved with all the hugs and kisses those two spoil me with.

Motherhood isn’t something that can be defined but it is something that you feel. It isn’t the same for every mom, but that sense of love and companionship you feel for your child is. You’ll never fully understand the impact motherhood has on your life until you become a mother and you’re holding that newborn in your arms and they wrap their little hand around your finger. I get emotional thinking about when each of my girls did that for the first time. It is an attachment that can never be explained but instead felt as you just know what they need or want because you are a part of each other. I thank God every day to be blessed with two beautiful girls and the fact that he allowed me to experience motherhood for myself.